Recruiting Blog Home > Blame-A-Nitus: The very fastest way to destroy your career when you have been let go from your job

Nov 17, 2009

I have been in the recruiting software and HR technology industry for about 14 years and have seen some of the best and worst in most any company and any company’s personnel. I myself have been in a few very bad situations with my job on the line and have handled things both very well and very badly, which is what this article is about. I guess it was about 8 years ago now that I almost ended my career with what we will call blame-a-nitus. I was a senior manager within a top Recruiting Software vendor and I had grown very resentful because several of the team that had begun with the company around the same time I had, were being promoted and I wasn’t. In my frustration, I was very vocal and an all around angry person to be around. After all, I was putting in more hours than anyone else, I was on call 24/7, and I was the go to guy for almost anything when it came to getting the job done and turned around on a dime. I thrived on the challenge and knew the company couldn’t afford to lose me.  Here in lies the problem and illusion that I think many top people in companies live under. I thought I was irreplaceable and that the angrier I got and the harder I pushed; the company would eventually give in. Boy was I wrong.

In comes Poker time – the big bet.

I guess for about a year, I had become increasingly bitter and it all came to a line in the sand one day when I didn’t get up in the middle of the night and handle a support call. I had actually thought it was handled and had gone back to bed but none the less the next morning came and there were still problems. I was called into the CTO’s office and was asked why I didn’t help out, I explained I had thought it was handled and then the CTO hit just the right button. I like many of you was and am prideful and put a lot of sweat equity into my work. The CTO told me that the team thought I had let them down and abandoned them when they needed me. Upon hearing that, I walked out of the room, stewed for a while, walked back in and told him I didn’t want the role anymore and that I wanted to take a different role on the sales team the VP of Sales had offered. I told him the money wasn’t worth the stress and the role wasn’t going anywhere. I basically put him to a decision and backed him into a corner. He had two choices in my eyes, make me happy or I am out of here.

Here Comes the Moral of This Story

I didn’t get any response from him immediately and it wasn’t until about 2 days later when I found out my fate. Instead of getting the role on the sales team or getting anything additionally, I was given a 40% cut in pay and told I would be going back to a programming role. Now you might think that was harsh but it was one of the best lessons I could ever have learned and it is the exact reason I am writing this article now during these rough times. I really only gave him one choice that day and that was to cut out the cancer. The cancer was me and my bad attitude. I was miserable to work with and I had just removed the one leverage I had. I let him know I was ready to quit. By doing that and despite my contributions, I let him know it was only a matter of time before he had to replace me. In one meeting, backed by a history of unhappiness and blaming other people, I nearly destroyed the career I had been working 80 hours a week to build.

REALITY CHECK FOR US ALL!!!!

Here is a fact that every person looking for a job right now should accept and build on. Everyone remembers the people who are negative and positive. If you work hard on your social network of colleagues and pound the pavement, you will more than likely have more doors open than most. All that complaining and blaming does it guarantee you will not move find a job and your industry colleagues won’t want to help or work with you. I don’t care if they are nice to you or are your friends; they won’t put their reputations on the line if they think you are going to botch up a role by blaming everyone when things don’t go your way.

What happened after that?

After about a day or so I came to grips with what happened and changed everything about how I look at my work. I stopped putting so much mental equity into my job title and career progression and just focused on being the best at any role I was given. I CANNOT stress how much more successful and happier I have been. After 2 months of programming again and with my new attitude, I was given my salary and a role on the sales team. Since that time I have moved into executive roles in leading industry companies. I also have an incredible network of friends and former colleagues that have helped me out because of my new found outlook on life. I pay it forward which makes me feel better and only builds on my reputation. I try to help friends and colleagues in every way I can. Some have reciprocated some haven’t but it is because of that work that when tough times come, I always have a network that is willing to help me.

I have developed a list of things I live by that have made a huge difference in my success:

1. I am replaceable; there is always someone who will step up.
2. I will never get promoted or move up in the world by complaining or blaming. So what if someone did me wrong. It happens to us all.
3. Anger is a guaranteed way to destroy your career
4. I can recover from anything; work harder than anyone else around you
5. Be the role model not that person everyone talks about
6. Never blame anyone for where I am in my career. Top people don’t expect life to come to them. They seize every opportunity.

I know it is hard to get over losing a job or a role. If you have to vent, vent in private and come out swinging. Hit your social network and pay it forward.

Michael G. Brandt

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By Karen Mattonen on Nov 05, 2009

Amazing advice.. thanks for the inspiring read!

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By David Webb on Nov 05, 2009

Good stuff. I have watched a lot of this unfold this week as a large local company announced a 6% global workforce cut.

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By MS Raghunath on Nov 05, 2009

Nice article, quite candid and lucid.  It does reflect the situation one finds quite often in the work place.

Thanks

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By Lefki on Nov 06, 2009

I think that you are absolutely right! We often believe that we are indispensible and irreplaceable to organisations, when again you are absolutely right, no-one is. It is so easy to fall into the negativity trap at work though, we think we are working too hard, or that we are undervalued, underpaid or unfairly treated and we just become more and more negative. Once we set off on this negativity path, it becomes so easy to think of 1000’s of things that are wrong with everything and everyone around us, the company, management, colleagues, procedures, policies etc, everything except of course for us. We see ourselves as the victim, the martyr, the only one who is doing anything right.  When things get to this point and we cannot do our jobs with a smile - even if we are doing a good job, we seriously need to think about making some changes. These changes can be changes in our thinking and way of looking at things so that we can bring our smiles back , or changes in the work we do, the department or company we are in etc. Sometimes that is hard to think about job change, especially in times of economic uncertainty, but there is really no value to anyone, in having negative and unhappy people on the job, first and foremost we suffer, often our families suffer as we take the stress home and the company also suffers because eventually, we will not be able to perform to our best ability!

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By Blake Harper on Nov 06, 2009

Great article about attitude,remembering to “pay it forward” though is just as important, numerous times in my career individuals whom I have helped have years later been in positions to and have helped me.

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By Girl Anonymous on Nov 07, 2009

You are correct and learned a valuable lesson the hard way; thank you for sharing and reminding us about the importance of humility.

BUT…..

What about when you work for a company that promotes based on asskissing, and not on merit, talent, intelligence or profitability? Sadly I work for one of these such companies, where your bonus at Christmas (IF you get one) is solely subjective, so if you happen to say the wrong thing to the wrong person a couple weeks into December, your bonus gets chopped into a Honeybaked Ham certificate. Say the right thing at the right time, the bonus can be five figures. Honest truth.

No matter how hard I work, no matter how many extra hours I put in or how many fires I put out, if I don’t kiss up to the right 2 or 3 (male) people, I will not be promoted or recognized. Mediocrity is now the company standard as a result, because only the male inner circle members who are invited to tee-off at the boss’s home will ever see any promotions, raises or recognition. And since the economy is in the toilet, I’m stuck in with a dead-end job that pays very well, knowing that I am more replaceable now than ever.  ~Sigh.~

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By Audrey Chernoff on Nov 10, 2009

I guess I was meant to read this today before I made the same mistake. I was definitely going on that path.

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By Suzan on Nov 12, 2009

I found your story interesting for another reason.  You, apparently, were able to recover your reputation after the period of having a bad attitude.  In my observations, a person would never recover their reputation after such a time no matter how much their attitude and work had improved.  In other words, you would have stayed in the demotion of the programmer’s position until you left the company, either on your own, or being fired.  I think that it is wonderful that you were able to mend your reputation and eventually go beyond the position you had been stuck in.  What I have seen is once a person has ruined their reputation, people in charge never give them the benefit of the doubt that they could change and their career comes to a standstill at that company.

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By Patrick Campbell on Nov 22, 2009

I’ve seen enough in my career to make me understand how rare integrity is in a “fear-driven” workplace.

I’ve seen control-freaks, snakes, and bullies win…and good people ousted. I’ve seen the lazy get credit for the hard work of others. I’ve witnessed those hired/promoted for social correctness instead of the truly deserving. I’ve watched fellow-workers’ heart broken when the undeserving politician rises through the ranks.

I’ve watched the mediocre who never really learned what hard work is, complain about injustice in pay and literally sabotage with backbiting the top performer’s career. And I’ve witnessed the spoiled wealthy social elitist with no clue to what it takes to get things done handed leadership only to relentlessly beat down the working class with completely unrealistic expectations.

It’s like one of those reality TV shows where the most deserving doesn’t win, but instead the best game-player/actor.

So we can either be bitter, or deal with it and become better. We can work harder and get no where, find a better place to work, or start our “own game” and play by our own rules.

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By Jimmy Hurff on Nov 24, 2009

“I’ll Show Them!!!”

A friend of mine once used the following analogy when describing what kind of impact an individual can have when leaving a job.  He said, “quitting your job here is kind of like pulling your arm out of a bucket of water.”  There are a few notable exceptions…the Pope, the President of the United States…but other than that, most of us will hardly even be missed if we walked out the door.  Do so professionally - I definitely agree that it makes sense to not burn those bridges you worked so hard to build.

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By Patrick Campbell on Dec 01, 2009

There’s a distinct difference in the maturity level of someone who walks off a job because they can’t control their emotions, and someone who chooses, rather, to take charge of their own destiny and find a place where they are respected as a person for their character, skills, and rewarded for their contributions.

Granted, in today’s market you may have to suffer at the hand of some corporate bully or deliberately taken advantage of for a greater length of time…but eventually when you find “a new opportunity.” And when it’s time to leave, you are making the choice….not someone else controlling you.

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By Judy on Jan 07, 2010

Michael,

Your article is sure to help many HR professionals make different choices in the New Year!  Thank you for your authenticity.

-Judy

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